My subtle voices in decision-making

Kelsey McNamara
3 min readJun 9, 2022


So today I did the damn thing. I finally did it. I bought a one-way flight to Switzerland, and plan to travel the world for 1 year to study yoga, and meditation, train to be a yoga teacher, and live a life of service as a Karma Yogi.

In less than a month from now, I will pack up my essentials in a 60L backpack, hop on a train to New York City, and fly to Geneva, Switzerland. My first stop is Sanskriti Yoga Centre in Scionzier, France where I plan to be a karma yogi volunteer for 2 months before my next volunteer opportunity in Austria.

I made this choice about a month ago, and today, I finally took action. But it was hard, I almost canceled and felt fear creeping in again.

So I stopped and decided to check in with my body just before hitting ‘book’ on Expedia. I did this decision-making meditation, offering both ideas to my body. The safer option felt rigid and restrictive in my body. The risker option felt calmer and more creative in my body.

I thanked my body and proceeded to click ‘book.’ Not looking back or forward, but being present with my decision. I felt immense joy, freedom, and gratitude at that moment.

After this, I heard two airplanes fly overhead, and took it as a sign that God is coming along with me on this adventure. I have no need to feel lonely or afraid, God is always above me, in front of me, behind me, and beside me.

Guardian angel by my side

Though this may seem like I’ve known for a while, I’d like to share the banter in my mind for the past month while contemplating this adventure. Here’s a sample:

Fear: you’re not gonna be able to afford any of this. So, you shouldn't go. You should stay home, make money, and wait.

Soul: Really? Well, I think there are alternative ways to travel, like volunteering. To go travel the world and study yoga is something I’ve always wanted to do, so why wait?

Inner demon: Well you’re not gonna be a good karma yogi anyway, you struggle with time management. You’re probably never going to be successful because people told you that you were not responsible in the past.

Fear: Yeah I think you’re best staying here and finding a summer job just like your siblings. You should just wait it out and pursue something else for now.

Soul: I hear all of you, and I believe you…. maybe it's not the time.

Photo by Uday Mittal on Unsplash — mind traps

*Sees signs like European flags, the word ‘Swiss’ in magazines, keeps meeting people from France, hearing people say Europe everywhere I go*

Soul: Okay God I hear you! I’m listening, and I’m trusting your path for me.

Photo by Jack Skinner on Unsplash

And it’s done… stay tuned for more updates & stories along my journey

With love,




Kelsey McNamara

Curious and adventurous spirit who is keen to share creative thoughts and real experiences. I encourage intuition, mindfulness, and connectedness in my writing.