My subtle voices in decision-making
So today I did the damn thing. I finally did it. I bought a one-way flight to Switzerland, and plan to travel the world for 1 year to study yoga, and meditation, train to be a yoga teacher, and live a life of service as a Karma Yogi.
In less than a month from now, I will pack up my essentials in a 60L backpack, hop on a train to New York City, and fly to Geneva, Switzerland. My first stop is Sanskriti Yoga Centre in Scionzier, France where I plan to be a karma yogi volunteer for 2 months before my next volunteer opportunity in Austria.
I made this choice about a month ago, and today, I finally took action. But it was hard, I almost canceled and felt fear creeping in again.
So I stopped and decided to check in with my body just before hitting ‘book’ on Expedia. I did this decision-making meditation, offering both ideas to my body. The safer option felt rigid and restrictive in my body. The risker option felt calmer and more creative in my body.
I thanked my body and proceeded to click ‘book.’ Not looking back or forward, but being present with my decision. I felt immense joy, freedom, and gratitude at that moment.
After this, I heard two airplanes fly overhead, and took it as a sign that God is coming along with me on this adventure. I have no need to feel lonely or afraid, God is always above me, in front of me, behind me, and beside me.
Though this may seem like I’ve known for a while, I’d like to share the banter in my mind for the past month while contemplating this adventure. Here’s a sample:
Fear: you’re not gonna be able to afford any of this. So, you shouldn't go. You should stay home, make money, and wait.
Soul: Really? Well, I think there are alternative ways to travel, like volunteering. To go travel the world and study yoga is something I’ve always wanted to do, so why wait?
Inner demon: Well you’re not gonna be a good karma yogi anyway, you struggle with time management. You’re probably never going to be successful because people told you that you were not responsible in the past.
Fear: Yeah I think you’re best staying here and finding a summer job just like your siblings. You should just wait it out and pursue something else for now.
Soul: I hear all of you, and I believe you…. maybe it's not the time.
*Sees signs like European flags, the word ‘Swiss’ in magazines, keeps meeting people from France, hearing people say Europe everywhere I go*
Soul: Okay God I hear you! I’m listening, and I’m trusting your path for me.
And it’s done… stay tuned for more updates & stories along my journey
With love,
Kelsey
